An Empty Life…

She sat in a lonely old chair in the corner of her dim cluttered room. The chair was as worn out as her look. She was desperate. Her plans were falling apart… Everything she had built up and hoard… all her malodorous lies… her accumulated excuses… her distasteful stories… She had finally been stepped on, found out…. Demolished. An intimidating figure shadowed her, by now shattered yet already pathetic, life… “If” she actually had one. She had started out as a fling … upgraded to an obsessive stalker… and finally… to a nothing … which suited her best. She was out of ideas… her grimy mind had finally clogged. The room was closing in on her… suffocating in her own deception. Do not pity her she simply deserves no attention. Degraded… humiliated yet she still cannot be shaken off… sort of like a piece of gum stuck under your shoe… just wears off as you continue stepping on it. Tears ran down her repellent chubby yet fruitless body… but no amount of tears would ever be enough to wash away her filth… as her soul is forever tainted.

Dedicated to Stalker…

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~ by Disturbed Stranger on June 4, 2008.

99 Responses to “An Empty Life…”

  1. She brought it onto herself. No pity.

  2. I LOVE THIS POST! beradtay chebdy! I love you you are amazing! :D
    Very strong and VERY TRUE!

    oh and I love what you did with the last post, wise settlement :)
    Lovely!

  3. comment approval? sema3tay el kalam? Good girl, so you do listen to me :)
    I’m sorry trash had to ruin this for you, but you must be used to this by now, remember school? lol and Uni? ;)

    again, great post.

  4. thats amazing.. i love it.. WOW! makes me feel like its a dream.. .. keep it up ;***

  5. WOOOOOOOOW
    U R AMAZING :) Keep Going Woman!

  6. wow mashallah i love ur writings!

    “like a piece of gum stuck under your shoe… just wears off as you continue stepping on it”

    i loved iy =)

  7. and people are insulted when I enter the Conanism mode……!!!

    the Guyish ver. would be…

    Dim lights, neon wearing off, far right, the light is twitching in ecstasy, a pile of books scattered in theatrical way, to show any doomed soul that he who is is smart and knowy… another pile seared of the floor of pirated movies, sony, maxtor, axe, and diamond, many names to which met his floor, in here no one is ubove nor beyond, a rug was in the middle full of burnt coal, shards of wood, and rice…..!!!

    in the corner layed an entity, darker than the voids in him, two black holes engulfing the sun stand high where eyes should be, shaded by the devil’s wings frowning, warning ignorant fools never to cross him, scared berserker, that what he is, the medals of he carrys his battles and quests on his body, he growls alone, dissing the cage he keeps his demon in, he is afraid, but this fear is only the bait that presents him with his prey, he seeks what he hates, he filters what he want, he place traps, jaded signs, bluntness, and pervertness, all these coat him, he enclosed himself in this repulsive layer of intimidation and menace, but and only but, selectivly, the berserker recede his aggresivness to the ones who withstand the maze of horrendousness… by then the prey is prisoned forevermore…..!!!

    I think this can be a new post…..!!!

    Arigato

  8. This truly intrigues me. You have painted a loathsome picture of someone whom we should feel complete indifference for, at best. And yet, something about her is vulnerable and warrants my pity. I want to protect her. Was it the chubby reference? Not sure.

    I sense a desperation in her that feels familiar. But I kinda wanna smack her, too. Hell, I wanna smack myself sometimes, lol!

    I love the way you write with such duality and ambiguity. Very nice, very creative!

  9. A different side of you; a side I know yet never read. Good writing, but the intention?
    Hate? Fury? I know what “inspired” it, but what made you “write” it?

  10. Amethyst- Good reply ;)

    q8tia- I know, people can’t get over me ;) and no it’s not because you told me, others did as well. Thanks anyway.

    maskeena- long time no see girl, how’ve you been? thanks for dropping by.

    Palomino- I know, I keep telling everyone I know ;) and thank you.

    journal entry- Thank you, I am glad you liked it. I hope the upcoming ones don’t disappoint.

    EXzombie- Wow. That’s pretty good. You should post it ;)
    and Do itashi mashite!

    BizyLizy- Very good. You’re supposed to have those mixed feelings. Now, if you were a compassionate person you’d want to pity her and protect her, however, if you weren’t, then you’d just want to smack her and look down on her. You seem to be indecisive … how neutral of you… sounds familiar ;)

    Powell- Very inquisitive I see… ok I’ll make this easy: Thank you, bad intention, yes, no, my fingers ;)

  11. different, but amazingly different .. LOVE it .. i don’t get why everyone’s hostile towards her.. i pity her.. she’s so sad and lonelyy

  12. Veeeeeeeeeeeeeery nice!!!! Couldn’t have put it into better words myself :* my little girl standing up for herself? I’m so proud. A fighter and a talented writer :*****

  13. i like this piece very much. you really have a knack for conveying lots of emotion with very few words. thanks it´s nice to know someone is reading and enjoying.

  14. Well-said. But now that that’s taken care of, can we please have one of your real posts? This is all good and smart as a reaction, but it’s a waste of your talent. Let this wear out by itself, like the rotten piece of gum that it is :)
    Now give us something creative and interesting. Show us how you can paint with words again.

  15. She’s vile

  16. LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!!!!!!!!
    I like! I like! :D yel sherirah! Brilliant and pure evil!
    Love the gum similie! How do you come up with these things? :P

  17. :S Very hateful but I agree, I know exactly who you mean. Those people who get under your skin, those who envy you and plot dispecable plans to see you fail. I hate them they’re pathetic! No piy here.

    Well done Disturbed.

  18. Disturbed Stranger you have outdone yourself. My favorite so far, personal and very expressive. Good job.

  19. You sound angry :( So violent. Why the hostility? lol but I love the room and gum description :)

  20. You’re a great writer.

  21. its my new favorite quote:
    “like a piece of gum stuck under your shoe… just wears off as you continue stepping on it”.

    You are ammmmazing and i hope the girl your talking about, the girl tht made you write this, burns in hell :p

  22. oh my! there is a kind of mix emotion here. its like she deserve it but as a being, one cant just let her be.. need the compassion to ease her disruptive mind. It is a love and hate thing. beautiful

  23. I don’t pity her. I hate those kind too. Thriving for attention when they know deep down that everyone despises them. Trust me they are so empty and they are aware of that. The kind that try to show to the world that I’ve got a lot of close and amazing friends and that I am doing fine. They are anything but fine. They are sick. No wait, scratch that, they ARE the disease. I second eulalia; whoever you are referring too is cat piss, probably dead jealous of you and keeps lying to herself that she isn’t. Sad.

  24. All I can say is WOW, I see the way you express the feelings is amazing. By the way if you want to watch anime and want a recommendation I would like to know if you saw old anime like Ranma 1/2, Rurouni Kenshin, and so on. Actually just tell me what do you like I will get a nice list ^^

  25. wow I wish I can express my reactions this way :)
    Stalker? Yeah they can be tiresome, I can’t help but pity them even though I know I shouldn’t. I used to have a stalker; she flooded me with emails, to her I was the world but if she saw it from my end, she was nothing but a “bug” pun intended. Poor thing. Seriously I don’t think stalker’s have much of a dignity let alone pride. It’s like they’re asking to be “stepped on” and ignored.
    Anyway, great post and as usual love your expressions.
    An update on my reading, almost done with the 2nd book and by God it’s on my favorite list already! I’m recommending it for students, a lot to discuss there. Again, thank you very much! Can’t wait to finish it and start the 3rd :)

  26. uniquely powerful imagery. great gravity;

  27. NnN- I’ve always said you’re too naïve … well, everyone says of course ;)

    Queen N- You couldn’t have put it in better words even if you wanted to.

    laineylapiz- Thank you for your compliment and give me something new to read ;)

    hanan- I do not appreciate being bossed around… You shall accept my posts humbly as I distribute them… Or else you will be distributed luv ;) (and you know what I mean :*)

    The Keeper- Ditto! :P

    Viper- I don’t know… they come naturally :P

    This Random Life- Those people exactly…Smart. Thank you.

    Elijah- Glad you liked! Update your blog already ;)

    Sarah- No anger… Just the urge to state facts.

    nyxxie- Thank you and you’re a great reader with impeccable taste ;)

    eulalie- loooooooool! That’s the best reply I’ve gotten so far *hats off to you*

    enemy- I like your input… as a suggestion though… not as a performance…

    mental challenge- Truer words could not have been spoken… you just summarized the whole event/issue. BRAVO.

    G- Thank you for your compliment. I haven’t seen those you mentioned but I do enjoy the clash between action and comedy, which I am sure you noticed from my choices ;)
    So anything action/fantasy/comedy with a HOT guy … and I stress on “hot” as the main character ;)

    Ancrene Wiseass- “I used to have a stalker; she flooded me with emails, to her I was the world but if she saw it from my end, she was nothing but a “bug” pun intended.” LOOOOOOOOOOOOOL how very very ironic… ;) You just hit the jackpot.
    “Seriously I don’t think stalker’s have much of a dignity let alone pride. It’s like they’re asking to be “stepped on” and ignored.” very well put. Great job.
    If you loved the 2nd book then you’ll most definitely love the 3rd… It’s a good thing I gave you the list in that order, saved the best for last ;) You welcome.

    Sumedh- I thank thee.

  28. Very, very interesting blog.

  29. ya bent il …. let me enjoy my moment! for once! :@
    and I second hanan, new post ^_^

  30. I just did :P visit me.

  31. oh and the post, it’s all about you ;)

  32. sounds like a dream…keep it going :)

  33. This is very sad. I relate this with another image: beggar stalking people for money. It’s not the same though maybe that’s why I sympathize with stalkers. Good piece.

  34. This is a wonderful write up.Indeed u deal with stuff as if you are in a dream, all foggy everywhere except just the object you want to concentrate on.Well your theme goes well with this as well. Hope you drop by.

  35. Buon lavoro. lo amo! molto espressivo! (let’s refresh your Italian) :P

  36. There is on he is as hot as me :P The anime called Hayate no Gotoku
    I have the hole episodes. If you have seen a lot of anime, they make fun of most of them, for example if you know yugioh they made fun of this anime and its a nice 52 episode.

  37. sometimes your stories creep me out, but I consider that a good thing. fascinating imagery.

  38. Very well written, strangely, I find something deeply attractive (almost erotic) in her.

  39. Bouncing off the bottom- Thank you for your visit and your compliment.

    q8tia- But I like to ruin your moments… and for the 2nd time then accept my posts as they come or else…

    Elijah- Saw it. Enchanting. Thank you.

    Amu- Dream? No. Nightmare? Maybe

    Homeless Man Speaks- Not the same. But most people don’t think very highly of beggars either.

    Enigma- Thank you… and I will drop by.

    Pure Hatred- Grazie il mio vecchio amico! Il mio italiano è perfetto!

    G- As hot as you? Hmmmm… I need to see some ID photos ;) I haven’t seen Hayate no Gotoku… But I’ll test it out… what about movies? Any good ones?

    orokenheartedmom- Trust me it’s a good thing… for me at least ;) Thank you.

    Paul- Well, she does tend to act like a vulagar sex addict… but her “repellent, chubby yet fruitless body” doesn’t aid that concept… “People” find it hard to get turned on by her ;) Quite repulsive actually.

  40. Yes, it’s a kind of strange reverse effect, skillfully achieved in the writing.

  41. You speak Italian?! :D

  42. You have talent.
    Keep it up

  43. Didn’t I tell you she was unbearable? :P Do you still blame me?

  44. i understand the whole concpet behind it but what made you write about it?

  45. When I read this blog, I feel like I just walked in the middle of a movie.. =(

  46. Paul- That’s what I tend to do ;)

    Ancrene Wiseass- Yes, a little, but my french is way better :)

    F.- I know I do, thank you.

    Pixie- (Now I know who you are :) ) and no I don’t blame you anymore I just never imagined such a “thing” existed.

    Annoyed Stranger- The “thing” I am referring to in the comment above ;)

    suspic- A movie?! Not even a book?!!!

  47. B3dain ma3ach. Enough replies to posts here. Use this time to come up with a new post. I want a story and I want it juicy, thrilling, and of course disturbing. And yes. I can boss you around. And no. I’m not accepting your posts humbly.
    *Don’t you dare ‘distribute’ me now.

  48. Well, the movie’s based on an award winning book.

    Better? :D

  49. hope u dont mind, im addding u to blog roll

  50. That was powerful! ‘her grimy mind had finally clogged’ Nice use of imagry! mmmmm! You always seem to put a play on words that i never expect. Saw your dedication… do i get one? ;) Keep amazing and stunning me :)

  51. wow and double wow with her sister!!
    amazing post, bas laish maku happy ending? or did I miss it?

  52. Oh my God you are brilliant…you are really really really brilliant. Thank you for leaving that comment. feel free to visit http://www.blueskyfox.com. You write well…better than I do and that is a compliment

  53. good post…exceptional job as always!

  54. yes my little girl is fluent in French :* (I take full credit of course) and where’ve you been he’l chem yom?

  55. Harsh… but influential and eccentrically writing…

  56. hanan- Lol. Yessum :P

    suspic- I humbly accept :) *hint hint hanan*

    rawdawgbuffalo- I don’t mind at all. I am honored.

    naughtycornero7- Thank you, you want a dedication? ;) then request a specific theme… (but please be specific)

    *this goes for all my readers.

    Fadidra- No. I don’t do happy endings… not unless you request for one ;)

    dark stranger- Thank you ever so much… I will visit :)

    Linda- Thank you :)

    Queen N- Busy…

  57. lol! mino hathy ely 6aba fyha? :P akid tistahel.
    very very effectively written and fantastic use of imagery. sorry if this sounds uncivilized but it feels like an indirect ‘proper’ spit in the face :P

  58. ladywhisper- Sorry for the late reply, but for some reason your comment was identified and categorized as a spam. I just saw it. Thank you.

  59. Dr.Know- I’m known to be ‘proper’ ;)

  60. Found you on Elijah’s blog :)
    Captivating blog, very nicely done.

  61. request? ;)
    I want something personal, a personal thought actually for a change. Just blabber the first thing that comes to mind. So ur thoughts as writing :) simple?

  62. I was just at the supermarket and ur blog came to mind, that I hadn’t visited for a while :) so my request, how about a supermarket image? It can be a disturbed supermarket if you want :P

  63. will she get a second chance?

  64. Johnson- Found me? ;) Thank you and welcome.

    Viper- Nothing is simple … but ok, I’ll think about it.

    Judy- Lovely ;) I like!

    Vixenfatale- I don’t believe in second chances. If you fail once then the second chance is just an opportunity for you to fail again… A confirmation of failure basically. What do you think?

  65. new post please :(
    it’s been a while now :(

  66. Retired already? :p
    Give me something to read!
    My request would be anything you have to offer :)

  67. UPDATE!

  68. I second that motion. Where have you gone? Not disappeared into your own story, I hope.

  69. Sorry everyone but I’m a little preoccupied. Will update as soon as possible.

  70. What a disturbing character portrait, Disturbed Stranger. I feel both pity and revulsion for her. Not because she is chubby, but because she has dug herself into a little corner of her mind, that she would resort to stalking. I’ve read this a few times but this kind of left me at loss for what to say, what to feel. It sounds like someone has been stalking you. At any rate, great snapshot character portrait.

  71. harmonie- The feelings you have towards her are normal. Thank you, it’s been a while.

  72. Under the shoe is exactly where stalkers belong!
    Hope she didn’t give you a hard time. She sounds pitiful and sad, I wouldn’t waste my time on her. Very powerfully expressed as usual.

  73. You go girl!:P Show that B what happens to stalkers who mess with disturbed writers :P LOVE the descriptions! Sad+chubby+ugly+stalke+desperate and repulsive.. she sounds gay :P lesbian? or transexual? :)

  74. I have to say I’m more disturbed by the readers’ comments than the post itself! Very harsh and aggressive words Stranger however a very subtle and fragile portrait.
    Something struck me as interesting though; P2C2U’s comment. I was actually thinking of a homosexual; a lesbian when I read this because of your continuous image of vulgarity and abnormality. Good job.

  75. Hey Karri! :)
    I didn’t mean to offend anyone by my comment, I’m just sharing my own little analysis ;) and I’m glad you agree with me. So come on Disturbed, tell us how right.. or wrong we are :)

  76. Can I answer that Disturbed? :)

    and hold on here a moment! Are you suggesting that just because she’s an ugly stalker that automatically makes her a lesbian?

  77. No offense Queen N but lesbians, specially q8ti ones are so fucking ugly! So it’s no wonder they stalk! Coz no one can actually stand them, they have to force themselves on ppl :) el mo9eeba they think they are charming and irresistible :P

    But bi’s are HOT I have to admit ;)

  78. Why would I be offended Viper? Are you calling me a lesbian? :P I’m not. I’m one of the “hotties” ;)
    and I totally agree with you..the ones we have here are nasty looking. Somehow they’re either fat or ugly so Disturbed was definitely right there :)

  79. quite interesting, in some ways it reminds me of myself, you know when you talk and blame urself for starting things anyway. a “tough-love” approach to consoling :)
    keep up the good work.

  80. Isn’t it time already for a new post? I am making a public demand here, speaking on behalf of all your readers (and yes readers, kaify. I’m speaking on your behalf. You all want a new post and you know it :)

    So … Don’t disappoint your readers. Honor our demand.
    Ya3ni bil 3arabi. get off your fat lazy ass and publish something.

  81. Kevin H- My time is far too valuable to be wasted on ‘nobodys’. Thank you.

    P2C2U- Love your equation and conclusion (first comment).
    There is no right or wrong… just the “reader’s own li’l analysis” ;)

    Karri Compton- I know, my readers are even more disturbed than I am… And don’t indulge P2C2U, she’s clueless half the time ;)

    Queen N- No you “may” not answer. And I’m always right.

    Viper- Treasure this moment… I’m only ever saying this once to you: I completely agree with you.

    Jadeq8- “reminds me of myself”? Are you a stalker? :P I read your “father issue” post… not bad… In my opinion, fathers exist for one reason: to disappoint.

    hanan- You are trying my patience. How dare you try to ignite a riot on my blog? ;)

  82. Looooool wow Viper! Disturbed agreeing with you :P ?
    Disturbed that must have been very difficult for you to write!! :P
    and now to unite with hanan :P Post! Post! Post!

  83. I dare…kaify

  84. “Treasure this moment”? Min 9ejech? Print screen 3ala 6ool!! :P

    oo q8tia ra7 afesh twayrech next meeting 3alashan teyoozeen 3an ligaftech!!

  85. I’d love it if you wrote a little something in honor of my birthday…this friday :)…gonna be twenty-3. Love! Your biggest fan : D
    P.S. miss reading your work and am so eager to see what you’ll be serving up next!

  86. Baaaaaaaaiiiih u guys are still at the begging business?

    work them out Disturbed :P
    (and post something while ur at it.. please :P)

  87. hanan, Viper and q8tia- Cool it. (in a warning tone)

    naughtycorner07- It would be my pleasure… any specific theme though? ;)

    Dr.Know- Et tu Brutus?

  88. LOL! Disturbed you are without a doubt the wittiest most interesting person I’ve ever known :P

  89. * sticks tongue out * :)

  90. That post was definitely disturbing. It is so venomous; it has a very personal feel. It does not feel like fiction. It feels like venting anger, frustration and revenge. Several of your commenters seem to imply that this was a real person and some real event.

    The gum on the bottom of the shoe image is unforgettable!

  91. God this made me sad … I know what it feels like to hate someone you don’t have to, but are forced to!!

    She… is just everybody who ignored her… she is someone who you could cry for, if only it wasn’t you she was after…

  92. P2C2U- Why thank you… Very observant of you.

    q8tia- very mature.

    Intlxpatr- Well… There is a very thin line between Truth and Fiction as I’ve mentioned in one of my previous posts. In one way or another fiction is derived from the truth. Plus, I have very imaginative… but sharp readers ;)

    Mental Mist- EXACTLY!! Perfect summary. I applaud you.

  93. Cruel but something tells me she deserves it. She sounds fake. She sounds like the kind of person that would brag about relationships she doesn’t have; sexual experience she doesn’t have; friends who can barely stand her; family who are ashamed of her and strangers who just want to spit on her!
    Now, I hope I wasn’t harsh and cruel :)

  94. very powerful, poetic, frantic, and sad. Nice writing.

  95. Delusional BND- *ding ding ding* we have a winner! You hit the jackpot and summarized her life in a nutshell!

    sogeshirts-Thank you, that’s just about all you’re going to find here, and welcome to my blog! :)

  96. WOW it’s my first time here, but i loved your writing i’ll definatly be here more i especially like “like a piece of gum stuck under your shoe… just wears off as you continue stepping on it”
    that’s just so ……
    WOW

  97. WOW it’s my first time here, but i loved your writing i’ll defiantly be here more i especially like “like a piece of gum stuck under your shoe… just wears off as you continue stepping on it”
    that’s just so ……
    WOW

  98. The I Inside- Yes I know I am a WoW ;) Welcome here and I hope to see you around!

  99. I’ve read them all this my favorite . You’re cool .

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