Subconscious Desires

The dark figure seemed satisfied. Pleasures of domination. Staring at her with the utmost superiority, he smirked. She looked up at him helplessly. But there was something not quite reassuring about the look she gave. Speculation.

“What?” he inquired.

And without further warning she jerked back her head and let out the ‘liquid’ she had refused to swallow, onto her ‘target’ successfully. Revenge. The dark figure grew impatient, however, still maintaining his awkwardly false smirk.

“What did you do that for?” There was a pint of anger in his tone yet no hesitation whatsoever. He moved closer towards her. That agitated her. She started to shake uncontrollably…Not out of fright…but tension. She moved backwards until her back was hardly pressed against the cold stone wall. Clinking, her chains tangled as she wriggled her feet feebly.

“Stop it” she finally managed to utter under her breath, “Don’t come any closer”.

The figure let out a monstrous laugh that echoed through the stony hallways. The voice shook her. Her heart sank…but she did not panic. Not for a moment. Instead, she looked at him boldly and with such confidence that intensified his fretfulness.

He made a grab at her. She did not struggle as he pulled her closer to him. She could feel the heat given off by his body and as much as her mind told her she detested him… it aroused her subconsciously.

Don’t come closer?” he whispered callously in her ear, “But you’re mine…”

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~ by Disturbed Stranger on April 15, 2008.

66 Responses to “Subconscious Desires”

  1. Intellectual Response: Great built up of suspense, mind-baffling still, moderately sensual and very satisfying.

    3gaidi ReSpoNse: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa77777 !! :P (can’t help the 3gaidi in me :) )

  2. The great style, gothic atmosphere, sadistic antogonist and a masochistic protagonist make an AMAZING narration altogether..
    keep up the good work
    bring on part 3!

  3. Fabulous work, I couldn’t be more proud.

  4. Oh my God. It’s not fair you give us this one piece at a time :(
    Brilliant though not fair.

  5. Entrancing; love to learn more about the characters. The story is becoming more arcane, are you going to give any hints to moisten the confusion? ;)

  6. YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY! FINALLY!! After a year has passed :D
    Great follow up! Very enticing and heart-clenching! Thank you Disturbed.
    Now… part 3? :P

  7. OMG. Aham shay I am commenting 3ala ur last poet when u’ve already posted the 2nd part :P mai5alef my mind has been splattered by the midterms :(
    2nd part lovely. Anxious to know what happens in part 3, please don’t keep us waiting too long :* work hard.

  8. Interested to know what the “drink” is…?

  9. This is chilling. I really am anticipating further appealing follow ups. Well done, You have really outdone yourself Disturbed.

  10. Bravo!

  11. For a disturbed person you’re writing isn’t that bad, although I think it wont end well :)

  12. The “jailor’s” smirk is intimidating. He’s too cool and relaxed for a person keeping a prisoner locked up. Something is not quite right there, I am not sure what it is though, I can’t seem to put my finger on it but I am sure the answer will pop up as part 3 comes along.
    Thank you and good work.

  13. Awesome story so far… I think it touches that level of thought/feeling that most of us keep hidden deep within us… (See, even in fiction you can’t escape truth ;-)) I look forward to the follow-ups.

    P.S. Thanks for visiting my blog… I look forward to exchanging thoughts with you. I’m going to add a link to you on my blog as well.

  14. It is not just another story. It is the story of many faceless women out there superbly told.

  15. You got me looking into the minds of your characters and I ended up disturbed. Great writing!

  16. Great follow up! And very true Grandma Julia, anyone who reads any work published by Disturbed Stranger ends up being disturbed :) (a compliment Disturbed)

  17. Masochism as subconscious desire? If this is the story of many faceless women (Grandma Julia’s input), is it saying that all women (faceless of not) are masochistic?

    Great work DS. Your descriptive talent never fails to impress me.

  18. Not all women are Masochistic and not all men are sadistic. We shouldn’t sterotype this just by reading this piece.
    Grandma Julia and Hanan what do you mean by “faceless women”?

  19. Interesting discussion going on. I don’t think all women are masochistic though, however, most women do seem to allow men to be the “dominators”, is it because having a butch-of-a-lover is more kinky, or do we plainly enjoy feeding their egos?

  20. Some women don’t like to be hurt, they just do it to please men because men like to see women as inferiors especially when it comes to intimacy.

  21. Nice work

  22. Amazing follow up Disturbed! You do keep your promises. I actually imagined something totally different. LoL but I have to admit what I had in mind was a bit lame :P But let’s see how the rest of the story will go. Bring on part 3!

  23. There is no such thing as all women are M’s and all men are S’s. Trust me there are a lot of Masochistic men out there and plenty more of sadistic women than there are men (you should know that Disturbed ;) )
    Your story is keeping me on the edge of my seat here and I love how you’re dragging this to create more tension and uneasiness. It’s working, good job baby girl :*

  24. OH and I luuuuuuuuuuuve that picture, which is why it’s my display picture now :) brings back good memories.

  25. W.R.M: faceless is how Grandma Julia describes the protagonist. Faceless in the sense of unknown or unseen. Invisible even.
    q8tia: No one’s arguing, yet, that all women are masochistic. I was commenting on Grandma Julia referring to this as the story of many faceless women. I just stretched the ‘many’ to ‘all’ and was wondering if her reading assumes that ‘many’ women are masochistic. Queen N seems to be of that opinion anyway. And to echo your and Rawan’s input, it might be an element that flatters men’s ego.

  26. ~F~ PaNtHeR- I prefer the intellectual response, thank you.
    NnN- Thank you.
    Victoria- Life isn’t fair (old record).
    Congenitally Disturbed- Hints are all over.
    The Keeper- A promise is a promise. You’re welcome.
    Zartha- a very special margarita.
    Anonymous- It doesn’t matter what you think.
    This Random life- Hopefully you’ll figure it out by the end.
    Regular Guy- “I think it touches that level of thought/feeling that most of us keep hidden deep within us… (See, even in fiction you can’t escape truth” Well done.
    Grandma Julia- It’s an honor to have you here. Great observation.
    hanan- You sparked quite an argument there. Thank you for your input and thank you for responding to other reader’s queries.
    Viper- I WILL take that as a compliment.
    q8tia- I know what you have in mind, I’ve heard this before :) you’re thinking of the “Fascism” discussion we had, aren’t you?
    Queen N- I should? Don’t think so… and stop stealing from me.

  27. Way3a ykhare3;\

  28. One thing I’d love to point out here: you do have a selection of extraordinary titles (old blog especially). The question is though how do you come up with them? :/ I suck at titles and headings! I can write a very good piece (if I don’t say so myself) but then the title I give it would be either so dull or repulsive it would ruin the whole piece :S But looking at most of your stories, poems and poignant pieces I couldn’t find one boring title! I am not envying you here I promise I am just wondering is there something I can do to avoid my typical monotonous titles? :(

  29. Could you next time give us more background on the aggressive mancho man :P I like to see his side of the story. “You are mine”? what are we back in the middle ages? Bulls eye, nice touch on how she spit on her oppressor.

  30. Perfecto.
    Subconscious Work of art.

  31. Au contraire hanan, you got it the wrong way around, I said many women are sadistic rather than the stated argument of them being Masochistic.

  32. :) very smart. Yeah I was trying to bring back chunks of that argument, it’s related 9a7? I mean that women are into the macho-type even if they are Hitler look alikes. Am I not right?

  33. Ur blog was random among many bloggers. Catchy title so I had to come in for a look :P
    For the sake of the ongoing argument has anyone considered Stockholm syndrome? —-}psychological response sometimes seen in an abducted hostage, in which the hostage shows signs of loyalty to the hostage-taker, regardless of the danger (or at least risk) in which the hostage has been placed.
    Enjoy :) and sorry for barging in.

  34. Amethyst- too much for you? ;)
    Mental challenge- Sounds like you are envying… anyway my trick with titles: never write the title after you’ve finished your piece. When you base a title on the piece you’ve written it will FOR SURE be dull. Start with the title and build your story around it (or not necessarily around it).
    Delinquent Oppressor- Middle Ages? Really?
    Pure Hatred- Now I remember who you are J Italian class no? Grazie. Prende un artista per apprezzare un’opera d’arte perfetta! (take that Mr.Gerricitano!)
    Queen N- stop harassing my readers.
    Q8tia- Sylvia Plath “Every women adores a fascist”. Wrong argument here doll.
    Chris- too early to conclude that now, but you can bring it up when the next parts come up.
    And “for the sake of the argument” (coming from sadists)… barging is good ;)

  35. :( no mu wrong …… laysh ne7eisah? :( Even if it is wrong… Ja’areeni (btw. I wrote this comment to balance your posts. Now all your posts have 35 comments :P u neat freak, bes ma testahlayn a5afif 3oqadech 3ala ur nasty reply :( lol :*)

  36. No Chris it’s not Stockholm syndrome. How is she giving signs of loyalty to the Jailor? :/

  37. “She did not struggle as he pulled her closer to him. She could feel the heat given off by his body and as much as her mind told her she detested him… it aroused her subconsciously”

    She did not struggle?? She was aroused? Is there no loyalty there, a tiny sense of it at least as if she owes him something?

  38. Queen N: There’s a thin line there. Pleasure at inflicting and/or receiving pain. The relationship is evident. I blurred the distinction for the sake of the argument. Sadomasochism is not too far from these two, seemingly opposite, isms anyway.
    and J.J: isn’t there a hint at pleasure here towards the end? Can’t that be part of an early submission to the jailer? Subconsciously aroused can lead to a more conscious admission of enjoyment and maybe inevitably loyalty.

  39. Obviously you don’t see the distinction between the 2 ;) hmmm first thing is first, which are you? S or M? If I can take a wild guess I’d say M ;)

  40. Posted my last comment minutes after Chris’s so forgive the repetition.

    Queen N: Labels are limiting. I don’t trap myself that way. I am who I am and that’s as much defining as I do.

    DS. Sorry for the back and forth. Give us the next part. We need a new argument. This S/M is getting old.

  41. “hanan” is a label. You don’t label yourself, others do. If you don’t know which you are (S or M) again (because you “don’t label yourself”) ask your partner I am 100% sure you’ll get an answer ;)

  42. LoooooooL
    Queen N me9erah :P
    ok, do me, I am a sadist. My gf says so. Then what? Analyze me :)

  43. Hello again :) I had to say something as I read the two parts of your story. Spine-chilling and yes I do agree very sensous!
    May I take a guess at what might happen?
    – she’ll escape? maybe help arrives? (just a guess, hope I didn’t ruin anything :/)
    As for the S&M issue. I don’t see the woman as a masochist. She just seems to be held her against her will and I don’t see any sense of cooperation, nothing but hate.
    I’ll be waiting for the sequel ;)

  44. * type-o: “held there” not “held her” sorry :(

  45. Nicely written Disturbed Stranger.

  46. you’re not a Sadist. You’re a Masochist. I’ll analyze you next time I see you ;) malah da3i “insawi unnecessary za7mah on the blog” ;)

  47. This was a brilliant part two, Disturbed Stranger. You really capture something of that dynamic on submission and power struggles. I found this kind of sensuous as well (I wonder what says about me, you’re the shrink) :)

  48. I really like your blog. I’m glad you started one.

  49. LoL. Quoting Disturbed? :P madree laish msawyaa blog etha ma tebeenah we talk :P
    But Queen N 9ej 7aba6’tini :/

  50. Chris- You’re jumping into conclusions that have not yet arose.

    hanan- Lol. How about you take over and do the rest of the replying to readers?

    Queen N- Yellow card. One more and that’s a red.

    Viper- We are not interested in your personal issues. Stress on personal, so keep them that way.

    Ancrene Wiseass- Your conclusions, too cliché don’t you think? Is that how you want the story to end? As for your Masochist remark… again wait for part 3.

    Judy -.- – Thank you.

    harmonie22- Thank you harmonie. I am glad you’re one of my readers. “I wonder what says about me, you’re the shrink” – you’d have to tell me more about your reactions in order for me to scrutinize you as a proper “shrink”. Who were you affected by? Jailor or victim? How? More on how you see the situation.

  51. ok. I’ll wait :(

  52. Gladly. Anything for you Dear Stranger :)

  53. Hello again. when I say that you are the shrink, I only mean that you have such a grasp of human nature on deeper subconscious levels, and was complimenting you in an indirect way. I definitely related to the female victim. In one form or another, I have been in her shoes. When I say that I also found the piece sensuous, it is because it is. there is definitely a sexual undertone to the power struggle going on, and what do relationships usually ultimately do but become power struggles where one seeks to control the other.

    Taking a step back, I would also say that this is symptomatic not just of romantic relationships, but perhaps human nature in general too, but I’m going off on another tangent. I think you’re an extremely talented writer with a liberated mind, which is wonderful to see. You have the power of suggestion, which is much more of a powerful technique then coming right out and saying it. I look forward to your next piece.

  54. I agree with every single word harmonie22 said. You are extremely talented. There is something about your writing that is missing from most writers which makes your thrilling and remarkable. Maybe it’s not about the topics you choose to write about because other writers might have already covered them but it’s definetly your style. There is something about your style that is capturing, I cannot explain it… but something is there, part of you is there with your style which is unique.

    oops I only meant to comment here and nag about part 3 :) but I got carried away.

    Btw. harmonie22 I visited your blog, looks like Disturbed might have found her writing companion, you’re quite the writer yourself. well done and keep up the hard work.

  55. New Post please, thank you for your time and sorry to “disturb” your blog (is the yellow card gone now? :P)

  56. And I don’t need to tell you how “special” you are, you know exactly what I think of you :*

  57. LOOOOL No I don’t want it to end that way :P So please surprise me and don’t disappoint me with an escaped ending :) Part three?

  58. harmonie22 and The Keeper- You flatter me… and I know I deserve it. Thank you and I hope my further posts wont disappoint you.
    … and harmonie22 “In one form or another, I have been in her shoes.”- Interesting, I would love to hear about it sometime and you might find out we have more in common.

    Queen N- sure.

    Ancrene Wiseass- but disappointment is my specialty … and nothing gives me more pleasure than to see those disappointed looks on peoples faces especially when they were in high spirits initially.

  59. :(

  60. hanan- Thank you… I don’t know what I’d do without you :)

  61. Well I am not surprised “Disturbed” Stranger ;)
    However, I wasn’t disappointed, I am more than pleased… sorry to disappoint you :p

  62. Hot discussion I’m sorry I missed it. “Pleasures of Domination” neat :)
    I was absolutely “shut down” by this part ” The figure let out a monstrous laugh that echoed through the stony hallways. The voice shook her. Her heart sank…but she did not panic. Not for a moment. Instead, she looked at him boldly and with such confidence that intensified his fretfulness.” Monster indeed. The category should be horror, thriller would be an understatment.

  63. Glad i found you. You’re work is dark, mysterious, and racy. I like it! Keep it coming and I’ll definitely be here reading! And where do you get your photos from, they’re amazing in detail, speak non verbal graphic words, and are very intriguing. You’ve sparked my interest, I’d like to know more about you and what else you write.

  64. I love the way you think. It shows from your writing you’ve had your share of experiences, not very nice ones I presume. I’d like to know more about you and I’d love to read more of your work.

  65. Класс!!!

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